Confessions of a Chocoholic
I’m a chocoholic. There. I’ve finally said it. I’ve been denying it for years. But, I’ve finally accepted the truth. I’m a chocoholic.
I’ve always liked chocolate. I mean, who doesn’t like chocolate? What kid doesn’t like chocolate? Everybody likes chocolate, don’t they?
I can’t remember a time when I didn’t eat chocolate. Except maybe when I was dieting. But, like many other people, when I was dieting I used to cheat, and eat chocolate anyway, secretly. Yes, I know, I was only cheating myself, but I did it anyway. It felt so good, and so bad at the same time.
So there’s never really been any time in my entire life chocolate-free.
Except maybe during the first year or so of my life. But I don’t remember so I can’t be sure.
Anyway, I’m not so different from most people. I sometimes buy and eat chocolate. I’m sure most of you have eaten some chocolate in the last month or so. Unless, for health reasons you’re not allowed to eat it.
Or you don’t like it! Do people who don’t like chocolate even exist?
I don’t buy chocolate every week, but sometimes when we go to the supermarket, especially this one, I buy some chocolate. It’s often just a block of plain, milk chocolate. Or, sometimes it’s white chocolate. Or dark chocolate. Even sometimes some kind of chocolate sweets.
I love them all!
Sometimes I can’t make up my mind so I buy 2 or 3 different kinds. Then when I get home I have a problem.
The chocolate problem
Which one to eat first?
I usually eat the white chocolate first. It’s always so sweet and tasty. It reminds me of when I was a kid and I ate Milky Bars (in Australia) – they were great. When I was a kid, white chocolate seemed so exotic!
The problem is, when I buy 2 or 3 different kinds, I find it difficult not to eat them all immediately. I mean, I put them in the fridge and try to forget about them. But every time I open the fridge door, there they are.
What’s a girl to do?
So of course I open one packet and start eating some chocolate. All the while telling myself that I’ll just eat half of it then put the rest back in the fridge for tomorrow.
And I do put it back in the fridge. Where it stays for about 10 minutes before I literally run back into the kitchen and take it out again and devour the remaining half. Then I eat the others the next day because I just lose all self-control when there’s chocolate in the vicinity.
No. Self. Control.
We all have our weaknesses, and I think I can finally admit that my weakness is chocolate. But I hadn’t realised it until now.
I’ve always loved Easter. It’s so acceptable to eat chocolate at Easter, almost obligatory. Nobody can accuse you of being a pig at Easter time. It’s even better when you have kids, you can eat their chocolate eggs while they’re asleep. Or you can buy as many Easter eggs as you want and nobody in the shop will judge you because everyone thinks you’re buying them for your children.
But really, most of them will become your secret Easter egg stash that nobody else knows about.
And Christmas is ok too. They make those Father Christmas shaped chocolate figures that are usually made from really cheap and not very good quality chocolate. But they’re still good, don’t you think?
I love almost all kinds of chocolate. Chocolate cake, brownies, M&Ms, Bountys, orange chocolate, mint chocolate, really sweet chocolate – you name it, I like it.
With a couple of exceptions.
Nutella. I don’t like it. I don’t like the nut taste and I avoid it at all costs (well, almost all costs – if it’s the only chocolate choice then I’ll eat it.) And chocolate truffles. Not really a fan of these, but again, if I have to eat some, I will.
When I first came to Moscow I was surprised at how different the chocolate was here compared to Australian chocolate. Of course, all brands have different characteristics. But one thing I noted was that Australian chocolate is so much sweeter than Russian chocolate.
It took a while to get used to, but I managed to finally appreciate the subtle, faint sweetness of Russian chocolate, and I now support the industry whole-heartedly. I could go as far as to say that Russian chocolate is even better than Australian chocolate because as it’s not so sweet you have a more chocolatey flavour. The sugar doesn’t drown out the chocolate taste.
As you may know, Olivier and I often travel. And when we do, we like to visit the supermarkets where ever we go to check out what goodies we can find there to bring back home to Moscow.
Like real parmesan cheese, for example. Or things like pesto, because it’s so expensive in Moscow.
Or, chocolate. Because there are so many new and different varieties that I haven’t tried yet, and I want to find out what they’re like.
So, since I’ve been living in Moscow and travelling to places like Paris, Berlin, Amsterdam and other wonderful exotic places, I’ve been trying out all sorts of different chocolates (and sweets, but that’s a whole other story!). I’ve made many new discoveries of different flavours, different percentages of cacao, different fillings and other exciting things hiding behind the wrapper.
If I remember correctly, there’s only one brand of chocolate that I really didn’t like, and won’t buy again. Unless, of course, there’s no other choice and it’s the last chocolate in the world. I’d buy it then.
So, I’ve been quite spoilt in that I’ve been able to travel and try different chocolate in many parts of the world. We even spent some time in Switzerland many years ago, and you all know how good their chocolate is!
Eating too much?
If we can turn briefly to the subject of my weight, I’ve been fortunate enough to have a metabolism which allows me to be able to eat chocolate and not really put on any weight. Or, if I feel my jeans are a bit too tight after excessive bingeing (not only on chocolate but other tasty snacks), then I just show some restraint for a week or so, eating lots of vegetables and staying away from calorie-laden food, and my weight bounces back to its normal state.
But, things have changed recently. I’ve been eating chocolate. A lot of it. And my waist has expanded and it won’t shrink back to where it’s supposed to be. Maybe it’s my age (I’m no spring chicken as you know). Or, maybe it’s because of what I’ve been eating since we got back from Berlin last month.
You see, I’ve discovered one of my favourite chocolates in the world, and I’ve only ever found it in Germany. It’s a simple chocolate, not sophisticated in any sense of the word.
It’s milk chocolate outside, with a filling of coconut mixed with cocoa powder. A bit like a Bounty Bar but not moist and not white (because of the cocoa). I can’t explain it better than that. Just believe me when I say it’s delicious.
So, when we were in Berlin last month I bought some to bring home to Moscow. Then I bought some more. I ate some while we were there too. And I also ate some other kinds of chocolate while we were there.
I decided that I would bring 10 blocks of my favourite chocolates home with us. Each block is 200gm. That means I brought 2kg of chocolate home to Moscow.
Trying not to think about chocolate
I put them in a box under the bed so I wouldn’t be tempted to eat them all at once. Of course, I put only 9 of them in the box, and ate the other one almost immediately.
Then I tried not to think about them. Tried to distract myself. I bought vegetables and tried to eat salads so I wouldn’t eat all my chocolate too quickly. But when I’d finished eating the vegetables, I wanted to eat the chocolate.
I don’t know how it happened so quickly, but all of a sudden there’s only now 200g of chocolate left under the bed. It’s the last packet. And I want it. Now. And I’m doing my best to ignore the need which is crying out inside of me because when it’s gone, there’s no more left!
And we’re not going back to Germany until the end of May. I’ll have to go without my favourite chocolate until then. Of course, I’m more than happy to eat Russian chocolate, but having this delicious German chocolate under our bed ready to eat at any time of the day and night has been kind of a magic time for me.
It’s been about one month since we came back with 2kg of chocolate. And it’s more or less gone (I’m pretty sure there won’t be any left after tomorrow).
And that’s how I realised that I’m a chocoholic.